Item #: SCP-5382

Object Class: Thaumiel

Laconic Containment Procedures: The foundation has spread the cure for SCP-5382 through clickbait ads with the help of Thilo Zwist, an immortal scam artist who can manipulate people with written words, with the added stipulation that anyone infected with SCP-5382 will be compelled to buy his products.

Laconic Description: SCP-5382 is both an illness spread by viewing written or typed text, and the text that will conversely cure the illness.

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