Item #: SCP-1459

Laconic Containment Procedures: Keep it in storage. Only Maintenance Technician Valora may use it. They are to be regularly given amnestics to reduce emotional trauma from its use. As declared by SCP-001-EX, testing is to continue indefinitely.

Laconic Description: A machine consisting of some controls, slots, and a main chamber. Activating the machine produces a single puppy in the middle of the chamber and asks for a method of death. If you are the first person to suggest that method of death, the machine will open a hatch on the ceiling of the chamber and produce mechanical arms to carry out your input. Once the dog has been killed, the machine dispenses a cookie to you. If your method has been stated before it just bludgeons the dog and doesn't dispense anything.

A researcher requests that the dog not be harmed, so the machine produces a cat and kills it instead. A salted cracker is dispensed.

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